The dried eyeballs cure for hysteria

I’ve been really struggling to find an even keel mood-wise lately. I think it’s partly due to menopausal hormones and the natural process of dealing with those challenges, but perhaps it’s also a less welcome side effect of the Ferinject treatment that I actually have the energy to get furiously angry.

One of my biggest bugbears in life is the noise my immediate neighbours make and this has become a focus for my rage. When I’m writing or doing some other creative activity I like to do it in quiet surroundings. Pretty much every hour of my day is punctuated with bouts of crying, shrieking or shouting and, since you can’t go round and ask people to turn down the volume on their baby or toddler, it’s been driving me nuts.

Feeling that I’m (over)reacting like a crazy person doesn’t help my mood either and the physical effects of feeling venomously angry without an outlet for it are exhausting. I’ve tried various ways of blocking or masking the noise, but nothing has been really effective until I realised that the fan heater I usually only use at night does the trick.

The downside of running the heater for more than the few minutes it takes to make an early-hours cuppa is that my eyes get very dry. But at least I can THINK and string a few sentences together, so I just need to remember to bung in some eyedrops occasionally and be grateful. I hope the fan heater will give me enough respite to calm down and deal with the “normal” emotional changes of menopause more rationally. And to get on with writing the memoir I’ve been wittering on about for years…

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6 Responses to The dried eyeballs cure for hysteria

  1. Amanda says:

    Oh Marigold! I don’t know whether to laugh or cry! My situation is so similar: home all the time with me, trying to do something creative, noisy neighbours. The only difference being that as I am in Australia, it’s a desk fan I use to block out the noise. I can’t offer any additional assistance or suggestions, but now when my neighbours are annoying me, I will think of you and know I’m not alone.

  2. What about meditation and acceptance practices, or do they just wind you up even more? I find they really help me. In Toni Bernhard’s latest book she said she uses her dog barking to remind her to be mindful, as opposed to being an annoyance. I’m trying that with Bobby’s barking, and the more I stay calm about it the better we both deal with the situation. Still practising though! Also sometimes find humming to myself helps, I think poss because it interrupts the getting wound up process. Or putting white noise on?

    I definitely find noise harder to deal with when I’m tired/not well.

  3. birdie says:

    Hello, I do sympathise! I’m sure you already know that ME increases noise sensitivity for many – it certainly did for me. And smell 😦 have you tried headphones with something you like on an MP3 player? Then you could walk around with them. You can even get recordings of breezes so it wouldn’t have to be music. Hope you find a solution that works for you.

    • Hi birdie, thanks for reading and commenting. Yes, I’m super-sensitive to “everything” and have been since long before I officially became ill. Things have improved on the noise front lately – my neighbour is now back at work part time so I get good chunks of quiet time during the day. Toddler is also growing out of her tantrums which is a relief all round!

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